


Survivor Guilt

by Garnigal



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Post-Episode: s07e22 Chosen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-27 20:58:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18746980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Garnigal/pseuds/Garnigal
Summary: The world almost ended today.





	Survivor Guilt

The world almost ended today.

She stood in a hotel bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. The room was filled with steam, but she hadn’t yet stepped beneath the hot water to soothe aching muscles and wash away the scent of battle and death.

The world almost ended today, and she needed a moment to process.

She knew there was nothing to hear but the water falling against the tub. She knew there was nothing to smell but the clean floral of her roommate’s shampoo. She knew there was nothing to feel but the slippery tiles. She knew there was nothing to taste but the mint toothpaste. She knew there was nothing to see but her own reflection.

And yet she kept hearing growls and screams of pain. She kept smelling blood and sweat. She kept feeling uneven dirt and tasting dust and fear. She kept looking over her shoulder for enemies and friends.

The world almost ended today, and she was understandably freaked out.

She’d expected to find a tangible mark of change. She’d expected to see new muscles and at least three extra inches of height. She’d expected to see Slayer writ large on her forehead.

There was nothing.

There was no sign of newfound strength and purpose. No sign of the injuries she’d taken earlier today. No sign of the unnatural evil she’d learned of over the past few months.

The world almost ended today, and no one even knew.

She finally stepped into the shower, letting the pounding water close out everything beyond her fingertips. She could feel the tension in her back and shoulders easing, her body slowly relaxing.

She could feel the cold hard knot of grief and disbelief in her throat loosening.

She sank to her knees, sobbing out her sorrow and guilt.

The world almost ended today, but she survived.


End file.
